Sharpening My Mommy Brain

It was five years ago that I graduated from college. Two degrees, two minors, a decent GPA and loads of confidence in my wealth of knowledge. I could quote encyclicals, develop syllogisms, explain the statistical probability of a quarter landing on heads, and prove God’s existence all without breaking a sweat or sprouting a gray hair.

Saying it was five years ago makes me feel really, really young. Like “Oh sweetie, you have no idea how new you are” kind of young. Five years is not a long time. Considering how dull my academic intellect is, however, makes me feel like it was eons ago because it might as well have been. I have vague recollections of studying theology, psychology, and world literature, but I couldn’t tell you about much of it now. I remember loving Beowulf so much that I bought myself a limited edition copy at Barnes & Noble; and then when I lost it at Coldstone, never to see it again, I bought a replacement. Don’t ask me for a summary though, because I’ll refer you to Spark Notes (Sorry, Dr. Nick).

Basically, what happened between turning my tassel and now is marriage and mommyhood. Unlike my dusty, rusty knowledge within the realm of Academia, my expertise in my own home is well beyond the Ph.D. level. As of right now I’m fluent in three forms of English: Indistinguishable, Broken-Gurgle, and Cooing. When walking into a domestic crime scene, I know immediately which kid spilled the water and which kid got too curious about my Kindle. I know how to get the stain out of any hard surface or fabric. I laugh in the face of DRY CLEAN ONLY labels. I know how to cook Andrew’s favorite foods to perfection and I can spot sprouting poison ivy in the yard from 30 feet. The daily ins and outs are etched on my brain and I have my finger on the pulse of our home. No detail goes unnoticed, though because I’m so on-demand as the wife and mama, many go unattended. 

It’s a little tough to accept and reveal – the fact that I can’t really talk politics or religion on an intelligent level anymore – because there’s something thrilling about intellectual discussion and developing theories and opinions regarding anything. It was this type of conversation that made Andrew and I fall head over heels for each other, but now if he brings up Ted Cruz or the House passing some bill, my mind and face go blank.

It’s true that the book knowledge from my days as a Raven isn’t exactly necessary for cookin’ up lunchtime mac-n-cheese, so naturally those muscles have atrophied. What I want to do is nurse them back to health because I think it’s important to keep up with current issues and maintain the ability to speak intelligently on the Catholic faith. Here in the Bible Belt, it comes in handy if you’re well versed in the rarer religion. Not to mention that it’d be fun to wax merrily on subjects outside the realm of domesticity with my husband.

And so, here’s my proposition: Once a week (for now) I will rise at a shockingly early time to devote 30-or-so minutes to study. I’ll catch up on the news or page through a papal document simply for the sake of learning. I’ll do some recreational reading, too, and finally get to the stack of books collecting dust and calling my name. Of course, I won’t do it all at once, but gradually! Though the temptation will be nearly irresistible, I will avoid tasks on my computer. No emailing, budgeting, Facebooking, blogging, etc. Nothing I could feasibly do quickly during the day.

My efforts will kick off THIS week and I’ll have to follow up on my progress to make sure my nose holds fast to the grindstone. Who knows, maybe being the early bird will make it Five Favorites eventually.